Bk's party!

>The 4 ladies<

So yesterday we went for BK's party and damn the food was great! Haha, we enjoyed loads. The thing is, finally chris and me got to go out with marilyn and hwee li to this kind of events. It sure was a great thing.....So the day started out by me meeting christal frist. However, her clock didn't ring and so i went on to meet Hwee li aand marilyn first. But when i reached WS, received a text message from HL that she had to go back home and get something while marilyn was gonna come at 3! I couldn't believe that as i was already there! Literally at WS...so anyways, the two girls were the ones who were pulling my leg with a joke!!! Bleah, bleah, bleah..shiat! I actually got punked real hard by them! So moving on...the day passed by with marilyn, HL and i eating lunch..(ok excluding me, i ate earlier). However, chris was still taking the bus and so we decided to walk around WS and then trained all the way to TM to get Bk's present. We finally met chris and she kept apologising..lol! Hhahaha, walked around Isetan,popular,BHG and many other shops till i had friggin blisters again. Finally we found a present of our choice. Pretty artistic like i said, however HL was damn shy to pass it to BK. So in the end i did.Take a look:

There the big boobies!

Alright, then we left early and i'm sorry BK...coz me and the girls had something planned! So we walked all the way back to my house and it took like what? 45 mins? Yeah around there and once we reached my house, we played crazy games like truth or dare. It was crazy man! So many questions were asked! When i say questions, i meant crazy,bonkers questions! Hahaha, had a great laugh and it's been some time since we did gather like tht. I enjoyed!

Dined at TM

Keeping track of my life. I went to TM today with daddy and nicks coz mummy went out with aunty wendy... basically went there to have dinner. Walked around for quite a bit and went to popular in search of a really good powerful earphones. Too bad, i didn't really find something of my choice. Well, it pretty much sums up my evening. In addition, there were many weirdos there. Some sitting by the benches, some alongside the walk-way stones and many more near the MRT station. Pathetic man! They think they look so cool, however i shall not say anything. It's their life. Sometimes, i feel that these ppl are very confident of how they look and i take my hat off for them. Although this shouldn't be the way to dress, but even being exotically dressed up, they still put their heads up high. It's indeed the saying, "they talk the talk, they too walk the walk". They aren't proud ppl but just ppl with extremely high confidence level. I don't know why but somehow this confidence attracts me in a weird way. Some ppl tell me that i should have more confidence in myself because i look good. But i don't know why i'm unable to. However, there are some ppl who thinks i am confident and this just allowes me to think that i am confident yet not confident enough... i really don't know how to put this feelings into words. I try my very best to boost my confidence level but there are still some days when it all goes down again.(really not good). So sometimes, i just wish that i was these really weird ppl on the streets who are friggin confident of how they look. At the very least, my sister always talks to me abt confidence and now i'm starting to have some of it....let's hope i'll inprove

Over the edge

Okay, from Monday to Wednesday and still no postings are done. Well, sometimes i just feel like letting this blog R.I.P. However i can't. Because this is the only space i vent my frustrations or cry out to (though not literally). I seriously need to keep updates of my life. Well, so far, my life is good. The only freaking thing is that i need more things (like a job) to fill out the rest of my days! So yesterday Chris and me went to Ngee Ann to take a look (were supposed to play pool with friends at e!hub..shiat). Took a train as i totally forgot that there was a shuttle service available and landed at Clememti. Took a bus and we ended up at SIM university!?!? Like wtf sia? It was a bloody uni that was so friggin quiet and no wonder ppl were staring at us like we had something on our faces. (Now i'm aware!). Very stupid, but then after realising it was a uni, we decided to walk around and then made our way to the the polytechnic just beside it. (thank god Chris had a map)....The poly was filled with many applicants and it seriously, it was a relieve to see em' there. A girl approached us and talked us through the courses..(very amiable for someone her age). It was not really an fruitful trip for me but i enjoyed it all the way la. Christal, Christal!@ How blur and cute can u get eh? ....During our trip there...the most embarrassing thing happened! The train kinda went pass SP and Christal wanting to tell me abt it, mouthed "singapore poly" to me and yes..i DID nod! However i think she hadn't seen it and so with her ear phones attached, she shouted a "EH, SINGAPORE POLY LEH!"( the caps lock is to show the exertion, so precisely used in her tone when telling me this already obvious information! Hahahaha LOL!) It did indeed caught everyone's attention and some were giggling! Well..my face flushed again and she felt so PS at that time. Sucha cutie! ^^

The journey back was pretty intersting i'd say. Saw this couple kissing and hugging like theres no tmr...and the girl is abt 1.7++ while i'd safely say that her BF is a 1.5++? Like wth? Seriously....everyone was looking! First things first, they SHOULD get a room man. It was plain disgusting!
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Onto the next chapter. Have u guys ever had friends who are beyond description? Well, my sis has and there is a whole lot of story for telling. I didn't wanna step into it, but well, this thing between them just doesn't cease.

A fcking Bitch + A fcking Bas3rd (a couple) = A fcking disastrous relationship...
Can't they see it? The whole picture is so damn freaking clear! Just friggin break up la? That Bitch still wanna "talk" to my sister and act good...Like wtf? Back off man, my sis is already stoping everything so why step on her again? ...Man, i so have to thank god for the friends i chose! ^^

Results!

I took my results and hey, not bad. At least that's what i think. I am proud of myself. Lucky thing i managed to get myself into a poly. But hey, who knows, i might join the army! I mean, after reading the JAE book, i found the airforce and navy rather interesting. Not bad at all. I think i might be going there/poly... well i still have till friday to decide so i'll see how it goes. Anyways, after getting my results, i went home first. However i'm so sorry that i hadn't stayed back with my friends. Sorry, xr,i hope u r fine. U will be. I'm always here for you, u know that.

So....tht'd be all for now. I'm so beat and to celebrate everything, dad's gonna bring us to dine at Sakura tmr...love's it soo much!!! ^^

My secret

I finally cracked. My secret was out. My mother got a straight answer from me. I was bashful at the time. I thought i could i almost pass out from telling my mother the "secret". My mother on the other hand was disappointed that i hadn't confide in her about my safely kept secret. On learning that i had somehow fallen for this guy, she asked me why i hadn't told him. How could i have done it? I didn't know what the right feeling was and i definitely didn't wanna get hurt. Mummy is totally out of her sanity, she claimed that if she knew that i had liked him, she would've done something! I love her craziness but it was not me to confess my inner most feelings for the opposite sex. It just wasn't gonna happen, NO, noway! And then she told me that if i hadn't tried to at least tell him , it would be getting me nowhere. I know that very well, but i'm just too shy. Beyond shy if you can even imagine. It was my secret and only for me to know. However, i let it out to my sister and some of my friends. During that point, i only claimed that "he" was a passing crush. Howvever, his looks are more than just a passing crush can hold. Those features aligned so well on his face and with every thought about him, it just burns me deep to the bone, making me weak each time. Moreover, he already has his special someone and i wasn't keen on breaking up their relationship. It just all happened to fast, i know i shouldn't have added him. Before adding him, he was still single and when i've done so, he's attached. Then it came to a point where i wanted to ask him a question but screwed up and so i had to write on his wall. Writting on his wall was a F**Ked up idea coz he was now attached to blah blah blah(a name appeared at this point!) I was like -_-. I mean it seemed so much better when i hadn't even added him and seeing his status being single was like a great feeling. And then mummy said "it's only a gf not even wife, can break up what?!?!" I was stupidified and flabbergasted at her expression. She was friggin cool with everything. It seemed surreal but i'm glad that i told her everything. I'm so sorry for not telling her before. I promise i'll tell her everything and when i mean everything, i mean everything! U r the best mum!!! Thank you for supporting me...LOL..:D

Emotionally connected

Many days have passed by and i somehow feel better from the mess of feelings i had last few days. It has gotten me thinking abt many things during my time in bed. Although i'm lying on a piece of soft material, those thoughts still failed to vanish. I was so afraid and stressed up only to realise that i had to have a heart-to-heart conversation with my dearest sister tht really helped a lot. She made me realise that things were gonna be fine in the end. In any aspect, my family members will always be there to support me. I shouldn't think too much and allow it to harbour unnecessary thoughts. Like what my parents always say, "what's yours will always be yours". I think for now, imma go with the flow. Stop thinking of things that can barely happen. Yes i admit that it was my mistake for not thinking of my future when i was younger. But now, i reckon there's nothing i can do but just wait. I have no idea where i'll be going( coz i haven't even gotten the results), and this really kills me inside. Every night is just nightmarish for me. I can hardly close my eyes and fall into deep sleep right away. Thinking of my sister going to sch in the morning and me? Just staying at home( doing some cleaning if not go out), just really isn't helping a single bit. How i miss sch too.(i cannot believe i'm saying this, but yeah)....

How time flies....-_- Well, at least i decided on something and imma stay faithful to this decision. What can i say huh? I decided that i wanna stay single till....(i decide on the age for myself). Just chilling out with friends will be the most appropriate decision so far. However HE has somehow stolen part of my heart and i don't know how it happened. It's so scary to know that u have maybe fallen for someone and the only thing u wanna do right now is try and keep it to yourself/under wraps. (i don't know what u call it, but imma call it tht for now). However, it always pretty much messes up! Things just start to linger towards his direction once again and that is just bad. It's stupid to be thinking of someone when they barely even know u. So, imma stop right here and right now...(unless due to other circumstances, there might be a friendly progression, that i don't know....). But it's truly a stupid thing to be doing! At least i half recuperated from the "sight" of him. If he needs to show up again this year, i think i'll just have to put on a front and act like nothing's happened...I think i can do it somehow. Wish me luck!

Recap/summary of 09'

09' had been a really crazy year for me. This was the year that i actually get to know my classmates to a deeper level. Yes it's true that i had a fight with one of my classmates that happens to be one of my bro's now....I really misunderstood him for everything and i'm glad that we cleared things out. I mean, this year was great...there was graduation ceremony, O's, Prom and other memorable celebrations and stupid stuff that me and my friends had done...It was just a fast experience. I was takingmy O's like last few months back and hey, guess what? It's over now and i'm currently waiting for the results. Well, theres nothing much i can do abt now, so i'll just have to accept what i'm given.(Note, *i did my best for every paper=no worries).

Well, a little summary of how i had spent my 31st night. Well, as per usual, i went for the party hosted by auntie ......(don't know her name,sorry). She's a really cool person(for her age). Met a few ppl there and glad to say that they were my age. Joy Gomes! She was there and we were chatting up on the past, really funny girl...Being introduced to her childhood friend - Deane Angelo, he's a fine dude! Great mucsels in between...very cute for a guy he's age. Plus, he's also very open. (at the most to comment, Aaron was having a hell of a time there!...sitting beside Deane! LOL)

Talking to uncle John really makes me natural for the least to say. I mean, i don't feel all comfortable when i'm with my real Eurasian family excluding uncle Alan's family,aunty Sylvia's family and aunty Frances's family.....this so includes my cousin from the eurasian side. Glen and Mark...C'mon man...they are like my cousin and yet we can't open our mouths respectively to chat? What is the world coming to? Ok forget it....just move on.

Anyway, last year was really a spectacular year for me and i enjoyed it. What my sister said today really woke me up? Am i ever going to stay in contact with my secondary sch friends?

As quoted from sis.." you're the type of girl that won't stay in contact with your old mates! It's just like, hey this is over so bb!"

Am i really like that? Well, the ans is yes...i am an asshole and i don't know why? Come to think of it, after returning what i have to to my respective friends...i'm afraid we might cut all contacts. That's not what i actually hope to see...but coming from a person like me, i think the chances are pretty high! But i promise i'll try not to be that asshole with friends. I mean, i already let my primary sch friends slip past like that, and i really don't want history to repeat itself.